Never Too Old to Find New Friends

By: Mary Mohler, From AARP
April 1, 2011

Now that you’ve reached a new stage of life, and maybe have relocated or retired, making new acquaintances can be a little trickier.

Not only do you have fewer opportunities to meet new people, but “there’s also a little more resistance to forming new relationships later in life, and your skills can get a bit rusty,” says Marla Paul, author of The Friendship Crisis: Finding, Making and Keeping Friends When You’re Not a Kid Anymore.

Still, it’s important to make the effort. Close relationships with others are vital to your health - physical, mental and emotional - your self-esteem and even your longevity, according to recent research. So if watching Grey’s Anatomy is the highlight of your week, or you find yourself enthusiastically chatting with telemarketers, you probably need to make some new connections. Here are a few things that can help you.

1. Get over the idea that everybody else your age already has all the friends they need. There are a lot of people out there in the same boat.

2. Accept Invitations. Just getting out increases the chances of meeting new people - and friends are sometimes found in unlikely places.

3. Many colleges allow older adults to audit regular classes for free, and some have programs specifically for seniors.

4. Senior centers have a variety of classes, activities and even trips. Stop by and ask for a schedule.

5. Take a part time job, even for just a few hours a week. It will expose you to new people and give you a little extra money.

6. Pursue your interests and attend consistently so that you build relationships naturally.

7. Set up a page on Facebook to connect with old friends and friends of friends.

8. Invite a few of your neighbors for dinner. Cook if you like to, or organize a potluck, if you don't.

9. Get a dog and you will be surprised how conversations develop while on walks.

10. Work out at a nearby gym and join a class so you see the same people every week.

11. Don’t put too much pressure on a new friendship because it can scare people away.

12. Churches often make a point of welcoming newbies and introducing them around.

13. Volunteer in your community. Try createthegood.org or volunteersofamerica.org.

14. Be willing to take a risk. When you meet someone you like, take the initiative and ask for an email address or phone number.